New Year New Us

2014, wow that came up quick. This year I have to much I want to do and so much coming up to do, weddings, deciding to homeschool or not, possibly moving, deciding on having a third. I also want to get more done, be more productive. I often find when I finally sit down at 8pm I realize I can't recall much of what I have done, or it sounds like stuff that should of filled 1 to 2 hours of my day. I recently read "Eat that Frog" now I'm working on reading "Getting things Done" This also means I'm using my planner more and trying to set up goals, with a deadline on them. That was the number one idea I got from "Eat That Frog" I've been working on organizing more, so I can spend less time wandering looking and less time cleaning. Both girls have gotten new bookshelves to help with their rooms and it has already made a big difference. I'm trying to work out consistently. Get back into my old clothes. Who knew weaning would bring on weight gain? Building back up muscle that I used to have. I'm trying to find more time for prayer, for Bible reading and for church. Hoping to spend less time online and more time with real life friends. I many ways I'm trying to make my home life run better, waste less time, and find more time to be healthier and happier. Hoping this fire in my belly keeps me going. Studies show if I can make it to February I should be in the clear. I want out of my Stay at home mom rut and to feel back as my old self, which is my exercise is a top priority on my list. Mentally, physically, I need the energy and I miss feeling strong, and I miss seeing my abs. I can do it, right? Yes, 2014 the year I got my life back and balanced kids, motherhood, being a wife and being me.

Hold On

Last time while breastfeeding Liv this was the time I was about to give up. I was exhausted from being up at night, having to stop every where we went out to nurse, tired of being used as a pacifier. Everyone else I know who breastfeed gave up right around this time, the 3 month mark.
But with Liv I was determined to make it to 6 months. I would not give up and was so glad I didn't. What people don't tell you is that just when you think you can't handle it anymore, it gets easier. (people may not tell you that though because unfortunately most don't make it past those very difficult first few months) Some where during that third month Liv started sleeping better and longer. I could go out with just diapers and wipes, and unless it was a longer trip she was happy as a clam, not needing to nurse.
This to me is the best part and easiest part of nursing. No solids yet, so you don't have to worry about snacks or other food while out, no bottles or heating up formula. Just you and your baby enjoying life. And because I found it so easy and enjoyable we blew past my 6 month goal and nursed until Liv was 19 months. And believe me with all the problems we had in the start I never thought we would even make that 6 month mark. I really hope I can do the same with Ev or even longer if she wants. Horrible morning sickness dried out my supply, with out that I think Liv would of nursed even longer. Plus that breastfeeding bond that everyone talks about really kicks in when they get older. When most babies will be feeding themselves bottles and food you will have yours close to your heart, where babies belong.
So if you have reached the 3 month mark and think you can't take anymore to quote The Killers "when you can't hold on...hold on" I promise it will get so much easier really quick, and you will be so grateful you held on just a little bit more.

New Breastfeeding Ban

Image by sierraromeo [sarah-ji] via Flickr

The city of Forest Park has passed a city wide public indecency ordinance that bans breastfeeding on children over 2 years of age.
This ordinance angers me in so many ways. First to put breastfeeding in the same category of public indecent is a huge set back for Breastfeeding and is just wrong. A mother nursing her child is not indecent, it is the most natural way to feed a child.
I have blogged often about the benefits of extended breastfeeding, all of which are not even understood or discovered yet. This could prevent children from those benefits. It can scare mothers to hide in their homes and shame extended breastfeeders.
It could also cause problems for moms with children under 2. People constantly think Liv over 2 by her looks and behavior, but she is now only 21 months. If I decided to breastfeed her in public who is to say that I will not be harassed and questioned about feeding my child. What are woman supposed to carry around their child's birth certificate to prove they are not violate this new ordinance.
It also just sets back the whole breastfeeding movement. There has always been this mixed message with breastfeeding. That breastfeeding is best, but don't do it in public. This can cause many issues with nursing and can lead to early weaning. Are you supposed to carry around pumped milk, a cooler, a bottle warmer and then what to do with the milk you have in your breasts? It should be pumped out so your supply will not go down. Breastfeeding is based on supply and demand. It nursing sessions are missed often the milk can dry up. I know several people who had this happen to them. They would not nurse in public, mostly because of the public stigma attached to it.
Laws like this will keep woman inside and make them again embarrassed to nurse their children in public. Keeping the breastfeeding stigmas going instead of normalizing it.
It also violates state laws which in Georgia has no age limits on breastfeeding.
I am hoping that because of that fact the ordinance will be repealed.

There is a nurse in on May 23 at 10am to 12pm at Forest Park's City Hall. I encourage anyone who can to attend and help normalize breastfeeding.

This is not indecent, Breastfeeding is beautiful!

Weaning Happens

Image by stockerre via Flickr

When I became pregnant Liv started to weaned herself. It was a slow process that started with my milk drying up, went to some comfort nursing and then the end. The whole process took about 2-3 months.
At first she slowly dropped feeds, her first one to go was her before bed nursing, which from what I hear is usually the last to go.
Our last to go was the morning nursing session. When Liv wakes up I usually bring her in bed and we cuddle for a while. It helps us both wake up. She would lay next to me ask for milkies and just relax. I am not a morning person so when I stopped producing milk I was upset that our morning cuddle time was shortened a lot by having Liv say "hongry" and sign for eat.
After she dropped all of her milk feeds there was occasional comfort nursing. She would ask for milkies and nurse for only a minute or 2 when she was tired, wanted hugs or needed comfort.
In some ways I was sad that our nursing time had ended. But being pregnant and not having the easiest pregnancy I also was glad for it to end. I really did not want to tandem nurse either.
What makes me proud though is that we weaned when it was right for both of us. My body physically could not handle making milk and taking care of my new baby (that is what severe morning sickness will do to you)and Liv slowly learned that her nursing time was over and replaced with other ways to get comfort. She was not forced to wean, and I let her nurse when ever she ask, long after my milk was gone.
Now instead of nursing during our day Liv will just ask for me to sit with her, she will come over and ask for big hugs, want to cuddle on the couch or sit on my lap and read with me. The fact that she still craves all of this closeness makes the weaning easier on me, since I too love all the cuddles and kisses from my toddler. I think part of this comes with weaning naturally and it not being forced on.
We nursed till about 19 months, which is longer then my original goal of 1 year. I am glad I learned all the benefits of extended nursing, physically and emotionally and allowed this process to occur naturally.
I just hope that with my next child I will be as successful and feel successful in our breastfeeding.
Weaning happens, when the time is right for mother and child. And when it is allowed to happen in a positive manner that bond that was made during all of those closely held nursing sessions continues on to grow.

Suggested Readings:

You're still not Breastfeeding?

Image by sierraromeo [sarah-ji] via Flickr

Last weekend I had a girls night in. We has some cocktails, braided each others hair, and talked up till the night. Since cocktails were involved my girlfriends crashed on my couch.
The next morning they were excited to see Liv, since she was asleep when they came over the previous night. Well after hanging out for a while Liv came over to me and started to lightly bang on my chest, her sign for I want milk. My one girlfriend said "That is so weird she still does that, its not like you are still nursing her?" "well," I sheepishly replied, "we still are." "But she's walking!" my friend replied. Like the milestone for weaning is walking. I was so glad to have my only other close girlfriend over who has a child, who is now much older. She chimed in "I nursed Dylan till almost 2 years." "Oh" my other friend replied. I could tell she was weirded out about me nursing my toddler. And she didn't want to get into it with me.
This I feel is more common from people who have never breastfeed, if they have children or not.
My own grandmother made a comment to me about when I am going to wean. She never nursed one of her 6 children and knew so little about she asked me when Liv was young if I still have to burp her.
It amazes me how little people still know about the benefits of breastfeeding, but also the benefits of extended breastfeeding. The WHO recommend breastfeeding for 2 years. This was what I replied to my friend when we talked about nursing this long. "But yeah, thats for babies in countries with out good food." "No, babies in those countries often nurse even longer. This is the recommendation for all children, and most European guidelines reflect this." "Toddler are notorious poor eaters and breast milk is the best supplementation for them."

Well unfortunately I don't think I convinced my friend one bit, and I really don't think she wanted to here it, even though she wants to nurse her own children when she has them.
I just hope that with the growing "trend" of breastfeeding, and the growth of knowledge in how beneficial it is that there will be a trend of extended breastfeeding and getting out all the information in how helpful it can be. Not just for the child's health, but for tantrums, and bonding. This, in my opinion is when the bonding of breastfeeding is really different from bottle feeding. Most mothers hold their babies close while bottle feeding, but when their child weans to a cup this bonding time is often over. This time of closeness and comfort is still very present in a nursing toddler, and it is the part I greatly enjoy.

Extended Breastfeeding

Image by katiek2 via Flickr

So in 2 days Liv will be 1 and since we are still breastfeeding and going strong very shortly we will be extended breastfeeding.
I hate using this term on any child under 2.
The World Health Organization recommends that breastfeeding continue till atleast 2 years.
Many other cultures see nursing till 2 years as the norm and its not extended, thats just what nursing is.
I really hate the stigma put on mothers who breastfeed past one year. There are so many health benefits for the mother and the baby that I wish this was the norm. I hope one day peopl will realize and it will be come more popular to breastfeed a toddler.

Extended breastfeeding really is a term that should be used for older toddlers, age 3 and up. This is when I feel that nursing has become extended beyond the norm in many cultures. Say that though it doesnt mean that its wrong to still breast feed past 3.
For mother and children who keep breastfeeding over the 2 year mark they have an even great stigma and are often looked at as weird, sometimes even disturbed. Woman nursing this long often do not discuss their extending nursing. But for a woman nursing a young toddler who might be still nursing very often it is hard to hide the fact that you are still nursing.
When I nurse Liv people often ask when I am going to wean and mention the women on youtube nursing their 7 year olds, like anyone who breastfeeds past 1 year will never wean.

If you want to breastfeed past a year, and I highly recommend that you do, there are resource out there. La Leche League Internation is a great place to find woman doing the same thing you are.
There are many mom out there who are still breastfeeding, even though they may not all be open about still doing it.
Some moms are tantum breastfeeding, still breastfeeding their older child while nursing a newborn. So don't let pregnancy scare you into weaning if you do not think you are ready to wean.

Most important, always remember that you are doing what is best for you and your baby. You know you baby best, and you will know when weaning is right, which for most little ones is not even close to the year mark, but more close to 3.

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Benefits of Breastfeeding for You

Image by Chim Chim via Flickr

Most people have heard of some of the ways that BF is best for baby, but what about you as a mom?
BF has many benefits for your health and well being.

BFing moms are less likely to have PPD.

BFing momma's tend to have higher HDL cholesterol. Thats the good one that you want higher.

Woman who have BFed have lower risks of cancers, including breast cancer, ovarian and uterine cancers

BF is relaxing and releases hormones for momma to relax, not just baby.
Many women don't get to this point since in America weaning of the breast is usually early. The first weeks and even months can feel like a marathon but what happens after is truly that breastfeeding bond that is often talked about.

Recently a friend of mine posted on her facebook a pic of her and her toddler sleeping on her chest. Skin to skin contact. Many mothers on fb commented how cute and how they miss those days. These are all moms with children under 2 years old! I just kept my mouth shut since I get that skin to skin often. Almost once a day. And just that nursing closeness is wonderful to. I feel bad sometimes for what they are missing out on.

Breastfeeding is a bond for life and that is the best benefit of all. Feeding you baby in a loving, relaxed manner, keeping him close to you and your heart, and bonding and reconnecting daily.

Sick little baby

Image via Wikipedia

Liv has been sick for the past week. She has roseola, very common in babies.It starts with a high fever then moves onto a rash on their bodies.
She went from eating well to not eating any solids at all. She refused all solids and we are just on BM. This makes me so glad that I have not started to wean her, since I know whole milk is not enough for anyone to live off of. Liv stopped eating solids last Thursday and has started to eat some monday, but very few. The nutrients in whole milk are just not enough for a baby. This is why babies should be breastfeed into their toddler years, not just the first year of their life. Most toddler refuse foods for many reason and breastmilk makes up for all the gaps.
When she stopped eating solids I was not worried since I knew my milk was enough for her and will help her get better. My dr. was also not worried, knowing she is a BF baby.
To me this is just another reason why breast is best, and extended BF is best too. I feel weird even calling BF a toddler extended BF since to most other countries its not considered extentded, just normal.
Liv is not quite a toddler, but she is 11 months now so she is almost there.
I will be nursing my toddler.

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